our story

 "Our Story" is organized by the location where we were living at the time. Each location has a different page on the drop down menu.

Over recent years I have shared many stories that come from the experiences Kathy and I have had and the lessons we have learned from them. We have moved around the Western US and even briefly overseas. In our first years of marriage, we desperately wanted to begin a family but went through four years of miscarriages and other problems that prevented a successful pregnancy. And then, we had a child every two years for the following ten years. We began with a daughter, then added five sons. There have been challenges that almost ended our marriage but solving them has given us an exceptional relationship. We have gone from prosperity to poverty to prosperity. We have faced the repercussions of severe mental illness. Our children have chosen paths in life not built around the faith is central to how we live. This does not separate us but we hope they someday have experiences with our Savior like the ones we have had. Out of respect for their privacy, I deliberately left out many of our children’s stories. I left only those that directly impact our story.

In life you have many different roles professionally and religiously. There are many demands and responsibilities. As I was released as a bishop and even as a parent, I was feeling some guilt for the things that could have been done but I never got around to. But I have come to realize that you are never able to do everything that could have been done. The real question is, "Did I do my best?" If you did your personal best, considering your circumstances, you won. That's all there is to it.

A word of warning, especially to those younger than me. In my 70's I have had some rewarding spiritual experiences in my gospel studies. Their frequency and depth has changed for me. My opportunity to know the Savior better has improved enormously. But, in my prayers one morning I was thanking our Heavenly Father for these blessings, I received an impression: "I could have given these experiences to you forty years ago if you hadn't been so stubborn." I believe this impression was given to me so I can help others be more wise. It left me reflecting on my life to date. I can only learn from past mistakes and hopefully use them to teach others. But my commitment to put the Lord's will ahead of mine has frequently been limited. I used to reserve that commitment for special occasions. I had experiences with the Lord but I stood in the way of letting them be frequent. When the choice of good, better and best was placed before me I often chose good and better and left best untouched. If only I could have recognized forty years ago that the Lord's way is always better than my way. I could have experienced so much more. Please learn my lesson. Whatever your circumstances put the Lord's will ahead of your own.

There have been many challenges and trials in our lives together. Some of these challenges have been a direct result of a poor decision on our part. But there are others in which we have been in the wrong place at the wrong time, or that someone just acted selfishly leaving us as the target. This is mortailiy and life an be unfair. But the Savior can lead us through the unfair experiences of life and give our lives peace even in the middle of them. And ultimately He will make it right for all unfairness we experience. Someday, we will be rewarded for the good that has developed within us and we can be forgiven for our mistakes. And ultimately the only limit to the rewards we receive will have been placed there by ourselves.

Many friends have encouraged us to write these stories down. This is Ron's attempt to do so. Kathy will also make some contributions to this as she sees fit. Kathy has always had a different view than mine on our life's experiences. Our strength has come fom our seeing things differently. Our blended views have strengthened us and given us a more compassionate view of the world around us.